I had absolutely NO idea that Barbara was actually in Hawaii when I posted that - really! I was simply referring to something she said, a long time ago...
(I only discovered via Billie's facebook snooping,  - cross my heart and hope to die - honestly, honestly!)

“I've been things and seen places.” - Mae West

Surely the most important thing happening anywhere in the world today, is Barbara's Birthday.

Happy Birthday!

I won't say exactly how old she is, but it's an extremely important one. 

If you happen to ever read this Barbara, and I hope you do, then I'd like to imagine it's from the Hawaiian beach you so longed to revisit. 

There really isn't anything else to say. My love goes out to you and your family, I so hope you are happy, and will always remain so.

"Dear Buddha: please bring me a pony, and a plastic rocket..."

Remember when I used to bleat on and on about insomnia? Of course you don't.

Anyway in a complete turnabout, for the past couple of weeks I've hardly been able to stay awake. For instance, last Monday I didn't emerge from my pile of duvets until 1.30pm !!! Tuesday 12.30,what a lazy scumbag! If it were not for early shifts, I suspect I would rarely see daylight. I'm nodding of at random times during the day too.

Is it a new variant of depression? pure laziness? side effects of medication ? having nothing much to do when I get up? or simply the sub zero temperature in my bedroom?

It could be any combination of the above, or none at all, who knows? who cares?

In other news, It's the Ward Christmas Night Out tonight, humbug.

I'd secretly vowed not to go, after last years personal fiasco and my generally anti-social, anti-anything outlook, you can imagine that I might be less than keen.

Maybe I protested to much though, as my boss told me on Wednesday that he'd already arranged a lift for me.

So I might as well go, there's a Metro station right by the venue so I can sneak out if required. I'll finish this post when I get back, so there may well be some amusing drunken ramblings, or not.

(Three days later) well for the second year in a row I was home by 10pm. 

This year I was simply miserable. As the night progressed, all I wanted to do was stay sober and escape. Work colleagues and strangers alike slowly getting drunk around me, for some reason only irked me. Then when the 'entertainment' came on dressed as Firefighters; I made my excuses and left. In fact I walked home too. In the current climate,It was quite bracing, not really dinner jacket weather. 

The snow's back today...

“Talk to every woman as if you loved her, and to every man as if he bored you, and at the end of your first season you will have the reputation of possessing the most perfect social tact” - Oscar Wilde

 

 

“We build statues out of snow, and weep to see them melt” - Sir Walter Scott

Finally the snow is starting to disappear.

But that's not important, it bloomin' winter after all.
I'm worrying now about the terrible British postal system! (plus all the usual stuff I fret over of course), if you see what I mean.

By the way my Dad still hasn't said a single word to me (about anything) . By all accounts he's very ashamed of how he behaved, and apparently told my Sister so. The saddest part is he could never and will never tell me. such is life...

“Letter writing is the only device for combining solitude with good company” - Lord Byron

 

 

“The father who does not teach his son his duties is equally guilty with the son who neglects them.” - Conficius

Somehow, in yesterdays post, I forgot to mention my huge argument with my Dad. 

Maybe not huge by your family standards, but well, let's just say it involved my first shouting in at least 7 years (if you see what I mean), I do not , normally, have a bad temper.

It started with him offering my two year old Nephew a screwdriver (!) to play with. When I pointed out that this may not be such a good idea, he began on a rant about what a bad parent I was.  His logic was that since he had had four children and I only the one, he was practically Dr. Spock (go google him). Furthermore he told me that he "couldn't stand me"  (verbatim quote) and I'm a 'know it all'.

I can be insulted about pretty much anything, without it flustering me, but the suggestion I am a bad parent (not his exact words by the way) got me quite riled. So I revealed a few home truths about how his family merely tolerate him, and that I'm the only one who can be bothered to make it an issue.

Sadly he declined a reasoned debate on the subject, and simply kept repeating a couple of his stock phrases, before he went and hid, ostrich style (though not with his head in the sand, just in the kitchen). I could provide a detailed analysis of his behaviour, but I want only to describe how upset I was, not his shortcomings.

Today he could not even make eye contact with me. I was there for three hours, and he did not say a word to me (this is not unusual in itself, but I sensed an active avoidance today).

Well time for this big baby to go to bed, I have to work later today...

“What was silent in the father speaks in the son, and often I found in the son the unveiled secret of the father.” - Fredrich Nietzsche

 

“I like these cold, gray winter days. Days like these let you savor a bad mood.” - Bill Wattersonor“The English winter - ending in July, / To recommence in August.” - Lord Byron

Well the last week has been dominated by snow, on both a personal and national level. It's snowed every day since my last post, and although never quite a blizzard, the cumulative amount lying about is very impressive/depressing.

 

The media is full of the usual doom and gloom about how poorly prepared as a nation we are (and we are). On a smaller scale I've spent a lot of time digging out my little car, and on more than  occasion, digging it back in again (to my little yard, if you see). 

Billie helped with the shoveling last night which she unexpectedly enjoyed very much, go figure (the ice in the back lane, was a sheet about three inches thick) .

I had my first shift in charge for many a month, after my 'phased' return (which in itself sounds far more exciting than it actually was). To be honest it went quickly and without hardly a worry. 

I'll have to decide in the next day or two if I'm going to send that Birthday card I mentioned a few weeks ago. I've lain in bed on several occasions recently, mentally composing messages to go therein, but they all sounded inappropriate, hollow, or frankly just pathetic. 
International post waits for no man...

"What state do you live in?"
"Denial." - Calvin and Hobbes