“There's only one me, and I'm stuck with him.” - Kurt Vonnegut Jr.

I've just realised it's my Birthday - yay me! Things have crashed back to normal. Aside from the pile of unsorted clothes and general holiday detritus, everything is sadly as it was, and probably always will be. Next time a holiday photo, it's after 1am, probably best to get to sleep...

“How nice -- to feel nothing, and still get full credit for being alive.”

 

 

 

"Remember no matter where you go, there you are" - Buckaroo Banzai

(nearly two weeks ago)

Well here I am in North America. It's not the bit I'd most like to be in, but there you go - At least I'm (almost) in the same timezone.

The trip here seemed epic and endless. About 22 hours from leaving home, to arriving at the hotel. My luggage failed to arrive at Charlotte (North Carolina). Subsequently for the rest of the trip, and the first full day of the holiday, well let's just say I was even more curmudgeonly than usual. My bag arrived eventually, around 24 hours after we checked in. Clean underwear at last.

The first night I had just wanted to go home (but obviously didn't tell Billie), I felt very very negative, but the arrival of my medication and socks the next day helped quite a bit

The crowds are only rivalled by the heat in annoyances (it is Easter after all). The hotel is pretty nice, even though the wi-fi is a bit puny and I have to pretty much type this in the bathroom to get even a low signal. (just when did good wi-fi became key to a good holiday?). 

My biggest worry however is Billie. Her main concerns are her blackberry, her ipod, the car radio, the pool, food, thrill rides, and then maybe, just maybe, me?

It's a bit like being alone sometimes, but I've quizzed her and she assures me holidays with her Mother were exactly the same. So I'm trying to be cool and give her as much space as she wants.She is a teenager after all.

Meanwhile we are only managing half days at the parks, before the heat and crowds are forcing us back to the hotel (me for a snooze, she to the pool). What has amazed me is how little has changed in the 10 years (blimey) since I was last here. I've generally a good sense of direction and apart from the initial drive from the airport (22 hours travelling, pitch black, and annoyed) I've had no problems finding anything and I've been enjoying the driving.

(nearly two weeks pass...)

I almost gave up with this post due to the poor wi-fi, and being constantly knackered. Here we are at the Airport,and as there is free wi-fi , and our flight is somewhat delayed, here's part two.  As I sit here I'm amazed at the amount of technology around me. Almost everyone is attached to an electronic device of some sort. I've this netbook and my ipod, Billie is about a hundred feet away charging her ipod touch, and using he Blackberry. The last time I was here the most technologically advanced object I had was probably a paperback. I've never seen so many iPhones as during the past fortnight. If I were a visiting alien, it would have been an easy assumption that they were the standard Human communication method .

I was initially troubled by blisters, when they began to heal I re-activated an old work injury, whilst putting on my socks of all things. Consequently my limp continued. Just as that improved a little I got terrible (is there any other kind ?) toothache. Eventually my mouth could barely open and the left side of my face swelled to chipmunk like proportions. For a few days I had to eat only flat food, and very carefully! It's starting to subside a little , but at least it's stopped me from being too gluttonous, which is extremely easy here due to large portions and low prices. Then in true movie victim style I actually twisted my ankle, ensuring that I would have a limp in my right leg for almost the entire holiday.

Billie continued to be less than interested in anything Dad related (and it's my Birthday on Saturday too!) but I think this is just normal for a 14 year old, otherwise she wouldn't have even come I surmise. We've had a little friction but nothing like a deal breaker. I'm rambling.

(I know it's ancient history, but I've found myself almost constantly thinking of Barbara, which I've found to be both a comfort and a torment - no one to blame but yourself! maybe it's the foreign soil and the anniversary of last seeing her coming up. who knows? - who cares?)

If I think of anything else even vaguely interesting, I'll put it in another post. We didn't take many photos, and I don't think there's a single one of me, but heck I may even post one next time! Excited? Can hardly wait? I'm not really surprised...

(ps title picture is a fence at the Canada Pavilion in Epcot. Even long long ago the 'circle o vision' movie used to bring a lump to my throat, and a stirring in the heart. Strangely I couldn't bring myself to go in ...)

“Who are you going to believe, me or your own eyes?” - Groucho Marx

Past couple of days were horrible, a bit of a physical and mental crisis - no really!

Anyway, today was a mite better, I felt a little more upbeat, and the suddenly summery weather certainly helped.

I went to collect my new glasses, although they looked nice, a problem with the lenses means I'll have to return them, and they certainly won't be ready in time to go to Florida next week. Yet another early shift tomorrow, time for bed... 

“Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go” - Oscar Wilde

Just popped by to say how truly horrible I feel. 

No I haven't committed a terrible crime, I'm just a bit ill, and don't have the usual sounding board of a pathetic middle aged man, but I have you don't I? 

Somehow I made it through a very dizzy and nauseous day, with a very flat outlook on things. I have to pull myself together before our holiday, for Billies sake as much as mine. I'm sure once I get caught up in the whole experience I'll be alright. Won't I?

“The more you explain it, the more I don't understand it”

Not a blues song, but I woke up this morning feeling awful. When I say woke up, I actually mean emerged, as it was a very poor nights sleep/duvet wrestling match (plus I was worried by the strange, about to collapse, noises my house was making, was it windy last night?). 

I've come to the fairly obvious conclusion that I stopped my medication just a wee bit too soon (you think?). The dizziness and nausea this morning were just too much, and more worryingly I've been a bit 'down' too (oh really?). Billie pointed out to me that I was grumpy , and I'd like to add irritable, unfocused and increasingly negative  (being on nightshift only made my isolation and strange sleep patterns worse), just what you want before a long awaited holiday. So today its back on the tablets I go , for how long? I don't know, let's see what my GP says. 

Speaking of health type stuff, I had my eyes tested on Monday and was very disappointed to find I now need varifocals. Apart from the horrendous cost, there's the possibility the glasses won't be ready before we go next week. Plus this means I am now officially old! (I've been unofficially old for about 10 years).

Well I'm off to work now, feeling slightly less than healthy...

“The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, and do what you'd rather not.” - Mark Twain

 

“The world is a stage, but the play is badly cast.”

Our holiday is so close now that I've allowed myself to start looking forward to it, at least a bit. I've been convinced that something dreadful would happen since I booked. As nothing (apart from a newly scheduled 5 hour layover in Charlotte) has yet occurred, I've relaxed a bit.

Of course I'm incredibly badly organised (I think) and being on nights has limited my options for last minute shopping and such, but the destination easily reached is rarely appreciated (I made that up myself).

I had a drastic pre-holiday haircut, which for once I didn't immediately regret. I don't like it much, to be sure, but that's better than my usual total revulsion (and bonus - if I can find a hat big enough for my enormous noggin, my hairs short enough not to look completely ridiculous - I recently saw 'The Adjustment Bureau" I want a hat just like that!).

...Days later - night shift - finished , thank whatever you believe in!


Boy, am I tired. I'm too old for this kind of thing. 

I may have stopped that medication a little too quickly, feeling very very dizzy at times, and I've no idea how I feel emotionally...


I recently discovered 'Chuck'. I'd previously got it mentally mixed with 'Psych' , which is made in White Rock, so I couldn't bring myself to watch it (I know, I'm silly). But it isn't and now I'm already onto season 4, hope it makes it to a fifth... 

...love Jonathan Richman, but for some reason his CDs are damn expensive!

 “A dreamer is one who can only find his way by moonlight, and his punishment is that he sees the dawn before the rest of the world.” - Oscar Wilde