Breaking the 4th Wall Movie Supercut from Leigh Singer on Vimeo.

“Good taste is better than bad taste but bad taste is better than no taste” - Arnold Bennett

Oh deary me, tonight you find me very very very intoxicated, if you were here there would be no question I would not answer openly and honestly, but you're not, so ya boo sucks...

Somehow for three consecutive days I forgot my antidepressants, and all it's reminded me is how messed up I am, I feel quite quite awful. I really cannot face the end of my medication, but end it must, I suppose.

I haven't seen Billie in well over a week, how  I miss her. She was away at Tea in the Park  , near Glasgow, for several days, her first music festival.
Whilst super groovy for her, miserable for old Dad. It means I haven't spoke to anyone who's not me for very much quite a while, and to be honest, I'm quite sick of the sound of my own (thankfully still internal) voice.

Work continues to implode. Busier and busier, busier and busier, plus the inevitable collapse of my familiar routine. Don't get me wrong, I haven't felt this wretched in quite the longest of times.

I'm trying to think of an upside, er, nothing, nothing....

Be seeing you?

I can't make you love me... from yakkowarner on 8tracks Radio.

“Yesterday is ashes; tomorrow wood. Only today the fire shines brightly” - Eskimo Proverb

“There is not enough time to do all the nothing we want to do.” - Bill Watterson

I just can't seem to get properly drunk anymore. A bottle of wine tonight and all I feel is pensive. I dread stopping the anti-depressants, as someday soon I must.

Work is in such a turmoil, all is change, and sadly not for the good. Plus I have to attend a second inquest soon, I hope the coroner doesn't recognise me!

On the upside I have about half the money saved for another trip to Florida with Billie. We both acknowledge that this will probably be the last holiday we have together, probably forever, so hang the expense, i have a new passport and a credit card, let's go for it (in October).

I'm so very bored, but of course the tablets keep petty worries at bay, but I'd like someone to talk to that isn't me or you. If that someone was a lady, even more interesting, but of course this will never be.
 

Regrets? I've had a few... from yakkowarner on 8tracks Radio.

“I believe in luck: how else can you explain the success of those you dislike?” - Jean Cocteau

Best text ever received...

“From now on, ending a sentence with a preposition is something up with which I will not put” - Winston Churchill

Hello whoever you are, or aren't , if you even exist. It's been bloody ages. There were several posts that will remain drafts only, never to be "published", mostly because they were self indulgent self pitying crap.

Here we go.

First the good, Billie and I are getting along famously, this is not a new development, just something I'm really pleased about. she's the focus I need in life and my proudest achievement (although to be honest there are few rivals).
She made me a lovely cake for fathers day (see below)

Work is descending into something akin to a hell. Sometimes my job is the best in the world, these times are scarce however. More often than not work is a morass of red tape, shoutyness and general misery. Things should slowly improve, but the NHS seems to buck this natural evolution and gradually get worse. There's more to do and less to do it with. I limped home from work today, physically and emotionally wrecked, only pharmaceuticals propping me up.


I'm so bored, but thankfully not despondent.


The merger is inevitable, we will effectively cease to exist. The few survivors engulfed and absorbed.
13 years and then oblivion, what a sad end for what was probably the best ward in the hospital.

Frivolousness - I watched and loved all two seasons of "Person Of Interest", I can't decide whether to watch the new season of "True Blood" (bloody faeries) and the "Mad Men" finale was flawed but majestic; poor poor Don Draper....

"This is no dream! This is really happening!" from yakkowarner on 8tracks Radio.

“Laughter is not at all a bad beginning for a friendship, and it is far the best ending for one.” - Oscar Wilde

 

 

 

 

I Can Dream, Can't I? from yakkowarner on 8tracks Radio.

“Children begin by loving their parents; as they grow older they judge them; sometimes, they forgive them” - Oscar Wilde

Well hello abso' bloomin' lutely no one.

Much time has passed, and our hero finds himself completely where you left him, bored bu t not despondent. Well actually the past week or so, a little niggling doubt has crept in, maybe the efficacy of the medication is wearing out, I really really hope not, I've enjoyed the last couple of months of feeling okay.

I had a couple of day in mufti. A major software upgrade at work, and somehow, defying all logic, I was deemed a "superuser" what a misnomer, but someone thought I was up to it. Anyway it was strangely gratifying to be an observer on my own ward, what a lot of crap we have to put up with , both literally and figuratively.

I'm feeling really really happy about my relationship with Billie. I seem to genuinely matter to her, and she seems to value my input now and again. I wish we could have more time together, but be thankful for what you've got I suppose.


I've hardly watched any movies recently, I've been enjoying the 70's pleasures of "Macmillan and Wife" and only just discovered "Person of Interest". On a payday whim I bought the first season on blu-ray, and after 5 episodes, "I'm lovin' it"...

Old Man from yakkowarner on 8tracks Radio.

“Stranger, if you passing meet me and desire to speak to me, why should you not speak to me? And why should I not speak to you?” - Walt Whitman