"Misery. Sadness. Loss of Faith. No reason to Live... This is perfect for you. "

When Billie's away (Mothers 50th birthday expedition) it becomes super apparent just how little I have going on. It's somewhere far far below something and a teensy teensy bit above nothing, actually that's a lie, it's nothing.

It would be so easy for me to develop a drinking problem, and as I already have an eating problem, that seems the obvious place to go. I look forward to the slight change in outlook alcohol produces, and it's only being at work that stops me drinking every night.  I'm not making light of real alcohol problems, but I can so easily imagine how one would start.

Internal grumpy sod status, has once again started to spill over into the 'real' world. I've been managing to keep it in check for a goodly while now, but for anyone that cares to look (apparently no one) the evidence is there if you choose to see it (ditto). I must just finish by mentioning the most ridiculous nightmares from last night. the content is unimportant and far from interesting to anybody that isn't me, no the only (marginally) interesting part is I remember walking up from a nightmare, actually in the dream. that's right I'm having 'Inception' style nightmares now - we need to go deeper!

must watch this again - soon...