I've never felt quite so despondent as I did last weekend, I cried and cried, I worried and worried.For some reason I feel a LOT better today.
I'm due to see my GP on Friday, once again I must kneel before the god of medication - all hail the anti-depressant.
I just hope there's an alternative that doesn't make me feel as physically ill as last time.
On Monday my old back problem came to a head (an injury sustained on Ward back in the late 90s, you didn't sue back then - It plays up once or twice a year).
I actually had to shamefully get a lift home from my Brother, as I don't think I could have walked home in any decent amount of time (I live about half a mile from work!).
I had to ring in sick yesterday, I simply couldn't have managed at work. I managed to shuffle around the house. As long I was sitting OR standing, I was okay, it's the transition that was the problem. Today I felt quite a bit better , at tea-time I managed somehow to get into my car and drive to my Mams, I was going stir crazy(ier).
I should be okay by the time work comes around again.
To be frank, I hate staying off sick, despite being genuinely debilitated, I can't help feeling guilty, especially when the ward is so busy. In all honesty, I almost certainly wouldn't have managed, especially as the ward is currently so physically demanding.
In other news, whilst my brother Frank was here, he investigated my leak/flood, and peering behind my washing machine ( I simply didn't have the power to move it, in my present state) it appears to have been leaking for a very very LONG time, it was actually quite rusted away at the back.
My kitchen is gradually drying out, but I'll have to wait until payday for a replacement. I'll have to take my washing to my Mams for a while, how embarrassing!
In even more other news, three, count 'em, three! people from work, rang me (separately of course) to ask how I was doing, maybe I'm not totally alone after all!
“The pain of the mind is worse than the pain of the body” - Publilius Syrus
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