“Happiness isn't something you experience; it's something you remember.” - Oscar Levant

"Listen. Does this sound familiar? You wake up every morning, go to
school every day, spend your nights on the corner just passing the time away.
Your life is so lonely like a child without a toy."

I loathe Sunday mornings more than any other part of the week, I don't fully understand why. I know for lots of people Sunday is a time of relaxing, reading the papers, enjoying time with loved ones, maybe having a nice lie in and a lovely big lunch. But the am of this day is when I feel at my lowest, treading the dullest water of the dullest day, waiting for the next non event to float by, just out of reach.
Obviously I'm at a very low point anyway, but as I sit here getting ready to start work in an hour or two, on that day of days, well it's like going over my mental state with a very big highlighter pen. Please indulge my ongoing crisis, to paraphrase Casablanca, the trouble of one little person don't amount to a hill of beans in this crazy world, but I'm the only one looking out for my little hill, and I'm often heard to say, 'It's my party and I'll cry if I want to.

Without destroying the fun mood completely, I'm sincerely having an incredibly difficult emotional time, and I really find it hard to express how completely desolate and alone I feel (not all of the time, but it's getting worse). I try and joke about it , but the lack of anyone to talk to, is nibbling at the edges of my sanity I fear. I'm starting to worry about worry...

(to add to my fun , I'm finding work a bit problematic at the minute, I don't want to go into any details at the moment, but I'm bound to return to this topic sooner or later)

Well wasn't that a bundle of laughs!

“I was once thrown out of a mental hospital for depressing the other patients”